Just recently, an article ran on CNN’s website in which the author asked the question, “Ready for the marriage apocalypse?” (http://www.cnn.com/2015/04/07/opinions/costello-marriage-millennials/index.html) Citing statistics, international trends, and some personal conversations she held with some journalism students at Kent State University, the author suggests that the time may be coming – and coming soon – in the United States when marriage as a whole will be virtually extinct. In comparing the US with the Scandinavian countries, she wonders if what we have been considering as selfish – concentrating on pursuing one’s career, travel, financial well-being, and having children on one’s own rather than in a marriage relationship – is actually the right way of thinking. In those nations, such as Sweden, where 82% of couples have their first child outside of marriage, these focuses are considered what one should pursue, rather than marriage. In our own nation, returning to the students at Kent State, one young lady spoke to her reasons for why she would be fine remaining single for the rest of her life: “I would rather be alone, successful and happy than in a relationship where I’m not happy…I’m OK being single forever. As long as I’m happy.”
How should we respond to such a statement? As believers, we have seen that the God-ordained institution of marriage has been under attack for some time now, whether it has been the escalating divorce rates both inside and outside the church or the more recent accelerating push toward the legalization and normalization of same-sex marriage. What many of us have not considered has been the suggestion that marriage would fade away from the social context altogether. Our first thought in this regard should be to remember that marriage will continue to exist, even if within this fallen world it continues to be counterfeited, because it is established by God Himself to serve as a model of the relationship between Christ and His Church (Ephesians 5:32). It may come to the point where marriage only exists within the Church, but we can rest assured that there will always be a remnant, no matter how bad things may seem, who continue to follow the Lord. Second, as believers we need to recognize that this provides us with yet another opportunity to be a witness in our society. While society may attempt to follow what Ayn Rand once said was the “virtue of selfishness,” we know that selfishness and the constant pursuit of personal happiness (expressed so straightforwardly by the young student at Kent State above) will ultimately leave a person empty and unfulfilled because it is the attempt to fill the God-shaped holes in our lives with anything but God. When we are involved in loving marriages that reflect the truth of Ephesians 5:22-32, we are demonstrating to the world the grace of God. Must we give up some of our own personal desires in a marriage? Absolutely, but what we discover is that by dying to self and living for Christ by be faithful to the marriage covenant, we receive blessings and joy beyond what we ever could have following a selfish model of happiness. We discover that marriage is designed to make us holy. Happiness in this life is a fleeting feeling, but the joy of the Lord lasts forever. Are we showing this to the world through our marriages? Just something to think about… ~Pastor Roy
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